17 Parenting Secrets For A Successful Child’s Upbringing
Parenting is one of the most difficult responsibilities. This is because every child is born uniquely with his or her abilities. And the development and growth of each child varies. So it’s not like you have a standard template that specifies how every child would be raised. You surely need to pay attention to each one to know how to be flexible in your approach.
A child has no mature sense to discern between right and wrong, good or bad. Therefore, each one of them requires guidance of at least a parent or guardian to grow right. Don’t forget the popular quote that says; “Train a child on the way to go, and when he grows, he will not depart from it”.
In this article you would learn 17 proven parentings secrets to successfully boost a child’s upbringing, which will help you in your journey as a parent, whether a first time mum, first time dad, an unplanned parent or a guardian.
The single most easy way to groom a child, is by putting into practice what you teach them. Children learn by observation. Don’t tell them A and proceed to do B. Lead them by example. Children learn and imitate what you do and not what you say. In the words of Jim Henson – “Kids don’t remember what you try to teach them. They remember what you are.”
Parenting Secrets To Successfully Groom A Child
Introduce The ‘I Can’ Mindset.
Don’t make the mistake of grooming a child with a mindset that a certain person would someday appear out of the blues to help them attain a good life. Groom them with an independent mindset. Let them know that their future needs their effort. Teach them that they can accomplish whatever they set their mind to. All they require is the determination, hard work, consistency and patience.
Teach Them To Ask ‘WHYs’
We learn more through asking ‘WHYs’. Having an inquisitive mind helps a person to learn more and know more. Because knowledge comes from asking questions and carrying out researches. Kids that ask lots of questions have proven to become smarter than the ones that just go with whatever flow they meet. And when you have a very inquisitive kid, don’t silence him or her, respond to their questions as much as you can. Encourage them to question things and situations in order to learn more.
Encourage Their Little Efforts
Bear in mind that not every child would lead their class. Therefore, pay attention to your child and commend his or her progress irrespective of it not measuring up with the speed of other children. This alone would inspire the child to strive more to become better. When you condemn them for every slightest failure or poor performance, they start developing doubts in their abilities. And this ruins them psychologically.
Every child has his or her brightness rate, groom them with patience to get the better part of them. Don’t expect their growth or learning speed to be same as their siblings or the next door neighbors’ kid.
Teach Them To Speak Up
Encourage feedbacks at home. Engage your child in discussions or healthy arguments and encourage them to air their views without placing judgements, condemning or criticizing them. Let them know it is important to speak up and not lock up their opinions in their minds feeling that no one regards them. And when something happens, they shouldn’t be scared to speak about it.
“If children feel safe, they can take risks, ask questions, make mistakes, learn to trust, share their feelings, and grow.” – Alfie Kohn.
Let Them Know It Is Ok To Not Know Everything
A child who isn’t exposed to this knowledge tends to battle with inferiority complex. Teach your child that no man is an island. A single person doesn’t know everything. Knowledge increases by age and exposure to experiences and also by being open to learning from others and our environment. A child should not feel embarrassed to own up to not knowing a particular thing. Imbibe in your young one the habit to ask questions when the need be.
Teach Them To See The Positive Side To A Failure
Failure should not be treated negatively. A child should be exposed to the understanding that failure is an opportunity to see ones gap and work towards improvement. Continuous improvement should be a principle of every living being.
Teach Them To Be Contented
Endeavor to teach contentment. It is a very bad manner to have eyes snooping into other peoples business and feeling they are better or have it better than you do. Else this attitude would persist and can predispose one into becoming a menace to the society. Aside the struggle of inferiority complex this child will face in life.
Teach Your Child To Have A Choice
They shouldn’t just accept whatever that is thrown or shoved at them. Your child should learn to have a choice. Each one of them should have a stand and some personal principles. This will help them to succeed in the midst of peer pressure. Knowing what they want and maintaining their stand will make them not sway easily to follow crowds.
Teach Them To Read
Help your children to form the habit of reading. According to John Maxwell: “Readers are Leaders“. A whole wealth of knowledge is discovered in-between the pages of books. Buy them books from tender ages and cultivate a reading habit in them, through leading by example…read! read! read! This will also enhance their creative abilities.
Teach Them To Believe In Themselves
There is nothing to be compared to self-confidence. Letting your child know that you trust and believe in their abilities is one of the easiest ways to boost their self-confidence.
Parents are like heroes to their children. So know that your opinion matters so much to your child. It can make or mare him or her.
Teach Them To Listen To Others Opinion And Understand That Everyone Has A Right To An Opinion
Teach your children to be accommodating. To listen as much as they talk. They should learn to give others the opportunity to speak. They should give room to others’ ideas, opinions and contributions. Else they will grow up disagreeing with everyone and thus, they cannot successfully work with a team.
Do Not Be Abusive Towards Them
Don’t handle your kids in an abusive way. When they act wrongly, call their attention to it and correct them with love. Don’t shout or beat a child in the name of Good Training. Don’t call a child abusive or insulting names….you are worthless, you are so slow…..What you might not know is that words like these psychologically damage children for life. “They may forget what you said, but they will not forget how you made them feel” – Carl Buechner.
Handling a child abusively also plants fear in them. Your kids need their psyche and self-worth intact to conquer the world ahead of them.
Do Not Talk Down On Them
Children too deserves some respect. They too are human just like you. “Respect is reciprocal” as the saying goes. Talk to your young one with respect just as you would want to be talked to. When they talk, grant them audience and try to understand their point. This is how you know when they need to be encouraged or counselled.
Ask them for Reasons Behind Their Actions
Don’t out rightly condemn and punish a child when they do things off your expectation. First enquire the reason behind the act. And then advise him or her where necessary.
Teach Your Child To Avoid Procrastination
Teach your little ones to always promptly clear their tasks. The principle; “Never put off for tomorrow that which can be done today” would aid them in life. Procrastination breeds laziness. Teach your children to be time conscious. Good time management skill will help them very much in life.
Be Patient With Your Child
Don’t be too pushy. Give your child space and time. Observe them and give feedbacks. Most children work better when you put less pressure on them. As much as you teach them time management, don’t put them under pressure if you need their best results.
Teach Them To Have Time For Play, Exercise And Relaxation
Teach them the importance of play, exercise and relaxation. These will polish them at intervals and help keep them fit and at alert. According to Diane Ackerman – “Play is our brain’s favorite way of learning.”